KAN TAI PANDA ADVENTURES #3: Thorn of a R.O.S.E.

 

Scene opens with a very royal sounding musical score as a castle appears on the screen. A newspaper floats by and stops long enough to read the headlines, “Annual Display of Royal Teddy Bear Collection Today.” Inside the castle, there is a large gathering of individuals seated waiting for the unveiling and up on the stage, a curtain is drawn closed. Trumpets blare as the clock strikes the top of the hour.

MALE VOICE

All rise for the Queen and the Princess!

Marching music plays as from a door on the side, the Queen and the Princess walk through and up onto the stage and each take their seat on the two thrones.

MALE VOICE

Not only is this the official day of the Royal Teddy Bear collection to be displayed, it is also the official turning over of the collection from the Queen to the Princess. This tradition has been handed down for generation after generation. When the Royal Princess turns 14 years old, the Princess officially assumes responsibility for the collection and will then hand it down when her own daughter, the next Princess turns 14 years old. This will be the 14th time such an occurrence happens. Traditionally, on the day of the viewing, the Queen will arise and pull the rope to open the curtain so all may view the collection. The collection has been preserved behind a sterile environment and some of the bears you will see are hundreds of years old. However, because the realm of responsibility is being transferred to the Princess, she will draw the curtain back for the viewing. All rise.

All the members of the audience stand up and this is when we first see that Kan Tai and Panda are here for the viewing. As the Princess rises and walks to the curtain, she reaches up and grabs the rope, then looks behind her at her mother, The Queen, who nods and the Princess pulls the rope. There is a sudden gasp from the audience as we see that behind the viewing glass, all of the teddy bears have disappeared.

KAN TAI PANDA ADVENTURES OPENING
(Theme Song: “GO!” by M83 & Mia Lan)

EPISODE 3: THORN FROM A R.O.S.E.

When we go back to the palace, the royal police are there and Kan Tai and Panda as also there talking with the Princess who is in tears, bawling like a big baby. Very dramatic.

KAN TAI

There, there. I’m sure they will find your teddy bears.

PANDA

Do I need to watch out? I don’t need to be stolen as well.

KAN TAI

No one would steal you, Panda.

PANDA

Well, what’s that supposed to mean? I’m not good enough to be stolen?

KAN TAI

I didn’t mean it like that. You’re being sensitive.

PANDA

(anxious) A bunch of teddy bears were just stolen! I could be next!

MALE VOICE

What’s going on around here? What’s all the excitement.

When the man enters the scene:

KAN TAI AND PANDA

It’s professional wrestling superstar, TONY SAVAGE!

TONY SAVAGE

That’s me, alright. What seems to be the problem?

KAN TAI

The royal collection of teddy bears has been stolen.

PANDA

And I’m next!

KAN TAI

No one ever said that.

PANDA

(loudly) I said that! Not more than a few moments ago!

TONY SAVAGE

Any idea who took the bears?

PRINCESS

(crying) Teddy Bears!

TONY SAVAGE

The teddy bears.

KAN TAI

The Royal Police are looking over the scene. Why are you here, Tony? I didn’t take you for the kind to like teddy bears.

TONY SAVAGE

Oh, I love teddy bears. That’s the only reason I came.

KAN TAI

Well, perhaps you can help us solve this mystery!

TONY SAVAGE

Shouldn’t that be a job for the police?

PANDA

Do you even watch this show?

TONY SAVAGE

Give me a break, it’s only the third episode.

PANDA

Fair enough.

KAN TAI

(pointing) Look, video cameras. Maybe we can get a look at them.

TONY SAVAGE

I mean, we’re not the police so why would they let us look at them?

PANDA

Do you even watch…

TONY SAVAGE

I get it!

Scene switches to inside the security office where KAN TAI, PANDA and TONY SAVAGE are looking to the security tape.

KAN TAI

Nothing fishy so far.

PANDA

I thought we were looking for teddy bears.

TONY SAVAGE

Oh, brother.

KAN TAI

Wait a second. I know these two.

TONY SAVAGE

Do you? Who are they?

KAN TAI

They are…

Scene changes to a very pink bedroom with plenty of stuffed animals around. However, on a special display case are the missing Royal Teddy Bears.

FEMALE VOICE 1

I can’t wait to play with all of you.

Dramatic pause while the character sheet shows this female voice to be Lilith Twilight.

FEMALE VOICE 2

You can’t play this these teddy bears. They going to bring us a mint when we sell them on the black market.

There’s a second dramatic pause that shows us the second female is Sarah Twilight.

LILITH TWILIGHT

You can’t sell my new babies!

SARAH TWILIGHT

Oh, yes I can. We are going to get rich selling this collection. Do you know how many times someone has tried to steal these bears? Hundreds of times and we were the first to succeed.

LILITH TWILIGHT

Yes, but I want to play with them!

Lilith drops to the floor and throws a temper tantrum while Sarah ensures that the display is locked.

SARAH TWILIGHT

Cry all you want, you’re not playing with the bears. Once we sell them, I’ll buy you all the teddy bears you want.

Lilith immediately ceases her crying.

LILITH TWILIGHT

You promise?

SARAH TWILIGHT

I promise.

Lilith hops back up on her feet and gloms onto Sarah.

Meanwhile, KAN TAI, TONY SAVAGE and PANDA are speaking with the Royal Police Chief.

CHIEF

So, you are sure it’s these Twilights that are behind the theft.

KAN TAI

It’s right there on the video tape. All you have to do is watch it.

CHIEF

What were you doing watching the video tapes?

PANDA

Don’t you watch…

PANDA is stopped when TONY SAVAGE clamps a hand over his mouth.

KAN TAI

If you don’t get those teddy bears back, I’m certain Lilith will find a way to ruin them. She has very little self-control.

Loud crying is heard as the PRINCESS walks into the room.

PRINCESS

Don’t let her ruin my teddy bears!

She turns and leaves with a river of tears following behind her.

TONY SAVAGE

So, where do we find these Twilights and how are we going to get the bears back?

KAN TAI

I think…

She is sidetracked because as she looks up and out the security office window, she sees in big bright letters, “PRINCESS HOTEL”.

KAN TAI

… I know where to start.

Scene shifts to in the lobby of the Princess Hotel. We know this because behind the front desk is a big sign that read “Princess Hotel” in bright pink letters. A snobby looking assistant stands behind the desk as our trio of heroes walks up. His name plate reads “Arthur”.

ARTHUR

Welcome to the Princess Hotel, may I help you?

KAN TAI

We are looking for these two ladies and think they’ve probably checked into this hotel.

ARTHUR eyes the photo and his lips purse out.

ARTHUR

I’m sorry. It is not the hotel policy to give out information on our guests.

PANDA crawls up onto the desk.

PANDA

So, you have seen them here?

ARTHUR

(Frowning) I never said that and can you please get down off the desk.

PANDA

But you just said they were guests and no, I cannot.

ARTHUR

I never said they were guest. I…

PANDA

(Interrupting)said that you cannot give out information about your guests, which implies that these two girls in the photo are guests here.

ARTHUR

Could you please get off the desk?

PANDA finally relents and slides from the desk.

TONY SAVAGE

Sir, we aren’t trying to cause a problem here. These two women may have stolen the Princess’ teddy bear collection.

ARTHUR

Oh dear. I did hear about that. Such a shame.

As the trio continue to discuss things with Arthur, from around the corner two heads peek out.

LILITH TWILIGHT

Is that Kan Tai and her stupid panda? What are they doing here?

SARAH TWILIGHT

How’d they find us so quickly? And what are they doing with Tony Savage? We’re going to have to get out of here.

LILITH TWILIGHT

But the bears!

SARAH TWILIGHT

Maybe we can slow them down long enough to get the bears out of here without getting caught.

LILITH TWILIGHT

What do you have in mind?

SARAH TWILIGHT

Let’s go back upstairs.

The two disappear back to where they came as back at the desk, Panda has snuck around the desk and secretly plucking away at the computer keyboard.

PANDA

A-ha!

ARTHUR

(very annoyed) You cannot be back here! You’re supposed to be in the front of the desk. Only employees of the Princess Hotel can be back here.

PANDA scurries around to the front again.

ARTHUR

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have real customers I have to get to and you’ve taken up far too much of my time.

As he turns to go to attend to something else, the three walk away from the desk.

KAN TAI

You have the room number?

PANDA

You bet I do.

TONY SAVAGE

Let’s hit the elevator.

Scene changes to the hallway of the hotel. Our three heroes are peeking around the corner.

KAN TAI

You sure that’s the room?

PANDA

I know how to work a computer, Kan Tai.

TONY SAVAGE

How do you know how to use a computer?

PANDA

Have you ever watched…

KAN TAI

So, we just go knock on the door and hope they open up?

PANDA

I mean, we could do that or we could use this master key card I found on the desk.

TONY SAVAGE

You know stealing is bad, right? This is a children’s show.

PANDA

Well, it just kinda stuck to my hand, so what was I supposed to do?

KAN TAI

Okay. Here we go.

The trio tiptoe down the hall until they get to the door. Kan Tai uses the key card to open the door and as it opens, a rope pops out of the room, lassos them all and they fly into the room as they all yell.

Fade out to commercial.

BACK FROM THE BREAK and all three of our heroes are hanging outside of the hotel window. The Twilights are leaning out.

SARAH TWILIGHT

I told you this would work.

LILITH TWILIGHT

You did! It was a great trap!

SARAH TWILIGHT

Let’s pack up and get out of here before someone else comes looking.

KAN TAI

(angrily) You won’t get away with this.

The Twilights laugh.

LILITH TWILIGHT

We already have, dum-dum. Why in the world are you with Tony Savage anyway?

PANDA

He’s here because he likes…

TONY SAVAGE

Hey! I told you that in confidence! I don’t need it blabbed all over!

SARAH TWILIGHT

Tony likes teddy bears? Aww. Isn’t that cute!

PANDA

See? She figured it out on her own.

LILITH TWILIGHT

Toodles.

The Twilights disappear back into the room as the three continue to dangle outside the window.

TONY SAVAGE

So, what’s the plan here?

KAN TAI

Well, we usually have something clever but (pause) I got nothing.

PANDA

Well, we did pretty well for three episodes. I mean, when we fall to our deaths, I don’t imagine they’ll continue the show without us.

They are suddenly jarred by a snap where the rope is starting to break above them.

TONY SAVAGE

You mean like this? Okay, on three everyone kick towards the window!

Scene changes to inside the room where Lilith is sitting on top of her suitcase trying to get it closed.

LILITH TWILIGHT

(grunting) We should have brought extra luggage.

SARAH TWILIGHT

If you can’t fit it, you can’t take it. Going to have to leave it…

Sarah is interrupted by the screaming of Lilith who is catapulted by her luggage into the air as the bears all fly out. As she comes down, she lands inside the suitcase. As if magically on cue, the yells of the trio get louder as they fly in through the window and they land right on top of the suitcase trapping Lilith inside.

SARAH TWILIGHT

Oh no you don’t.

Sarah flees out of the room and down the hall.

MALE VOICE

(from outside in the hallway) Hold it right there, Twilight!

Scene fades out and fades back in to the same room, Kan Tai, Panda and Tony Savage have been release from their lasso and Sarah and Lilith Twilight are in handcuffs as the Royal Police are about to take them away.

KAN TAI

You should know that stealing is bad, Lilith Twilight! And you should be ashamed for helping her, Sarah Twilight.

SARAH TWILIGHT

Just shut up, Kan Tai.

LILITH TWILIGHT

We would have gotten away with all of these precious little bears if it weren’t for you, Tony Savage and that stupid bear of yours.

PANDA

Why does everyone call me stupid?

POLICEMAN

Okay, let’s go.

PANDA

I’m not stupid! You’re…

KAN TAI

(Interrupting) It’s not nice to call people names, Panda.

PANDA

Oh, you’re right. But I really wanted to.

TONY SAVAGE

So, what now?

KAN TAI

The Princess has her bear collection back, the Twilights are in handcuffs and I think we’re almost at the end of the episode. Perfect timing!

PANDA

I almost died today!

KAN TAI

You say that in every episode!

TONY SAVAGE

He does?

KAN TAI AND PANDA

Haven’t you seen any of these…

Scene changes to the Princess putting up all of her teddy bears when she notices one is missingand begins to cry a river of tears.

Scene fades to live action sequence with Kan Tai and her stuffed Panda

KAN TAI

Hi everyone! Thanks for watching again this week! Today we saw that the Twilights wanted something so badly that they chose to steal rather than go buy things for themselves. Stealing is never the answer no matter how badly you want something, so remember that the next time you think about taking something that isn’t yours. Isn’t that right, Panda?

She holds Panda up and shakes it a little.

KAN TAI

I agree too! We will see you next week!

The live action sequence fades to an animated warehouse sequence as once again the door opens and the lights come on as it has in previous episodes. Someone in a security uniform enters and walks over to a pedestal and places a teddy bear in a business suit on the stand. Somewhere else, someone is monitoring the action on a monitor.

MALE VOICE

(laughing) This is easy as pie! And it will only be a matter of time before I get my hands on Kan Tai’s talking Panda. It’s going to make me millions! (maniacal laughing)

Scene fades to credits.

 

CREDITS

KAN TAI as Herself

PANDA voiced by Cash Mack

TONY SAVAGE as Himself

SARAH TWILIGHT as Herself

LILITH TWILIGHT as Herself

ANNOUNCER voiced by Stanley Josh

ARTHUR voiced by Jeff Moore

POLICEMAN voiced by Nip Sails

PRINCESS voiced by Jan Marley

END EPISODE